Reconcile Part II

Synonyms: accommodate, accord, accustom, adjust, appease, arbitrate, arrange, assuage, attune, bring to terms, bring together, bury the hatchet, come together, compose, conciliate, conform, coordinate, fit, fix up, get together on, harmonize, integrate, intercede, kiss and make up, make matters up, make up, make peace, mediate, mitigate, pacify, patch things up, patch up, placate, propitiate, proportion, re-establish, reconciliation, rectify, regulate, resolve, restore harmony, reunite, settle, suit, tune, win over.

I had the most inspiring conversation with the most unlikely of people...my dad. He called last night knowing that huge changes were slowly taking place and wanted to check in with me. To say we've been estranged for significant parts of my life would be accurate. He has moved in and out of my time-line and I have learned to appreciate those moments he appears because they are never shallow. This phone call was no different. As if he knew what I needed to hear, he began telling me of Myself as a child. He ran through the early part of the time-line I have nearly forgotten. The part before everything fell apart between my parents. With all the love a father can feel for his daughter, he described the free-spirited, ever-questioning, stubborn little perfectionist I once was. He tells me he still sees her now as shy as ever when it comes to sharing what she loves. I told him I'd made progress (and I think I have)! But he still wishes he had encourage me more and would start doing it now. Right Now. He told me of every performance he had slipped into and out of...his thoughts on my writing, my photography...even the singing which is so deeply buried in memory his words could barely dig it out for me. He was reconnecting me with Me. It was his gift this holiday season. But he asked me for a gift, too. And I listened having given him nothing several years now. He asked me not to fear sharing. He asked me to trust myself and allow the emotions of all that is transpiring create the works I have hidden in me. He asked me not to be a perfectionist and critical of what I was creating. Yeah...it was a full fledged rockin' pep talk. And my heart heard every word. What am I waiting for?